Good Question! Part 3

How do I actually forgive someone?


  1. What is the most ridiculous thing you’ve ever had to apologize for?
  2. We’ve been forgiven for our sins as sons and daughters of God. He expects us to forgive as he did. When has this been hard for you?

Steps to forgiveness:

  1. Start with yourself
  2. The first move

Start With Yourself:

We need to deal with our own guilt before we can deal with someone else’s. Jesus comes along, sees our guilt, and says, “When I see you, I don’t see that.” How does this affect your view of guilt and any guilt you might be holding on to?

Think of a time you felt guilty. How could that guilt lead you to be honest about your mistakes?

Condemnation is the strong disapproval of someone for something they’ve done, while guilt is a feeling of wrongdoing. Condemnation comes from the enemy, but guilt can be used by the Lord to turn us toward him. 

  • How do we recognize the difference between guilt and condemnation? 

The First Move:

Forgiveness is far more about the one offering it than the one receiving it...

Think about a time (past or present) that you faced a decision on forgiving someone.

  • What held you back? How would extending forgiveness change your perspective on the other person or the situation? 

You choosing to forgive someone is your story, not theirs. When was a time you neglected to forgive someone because we hoped the other person would continue to feel bad about what they did?

Are you still feeling hurt from a situation that’s making it difficult for you to forgive?

Go Deeper

Forgiveness can be a challenging thing. It’s something that we all wrestle with as believers at some time or another. The truth is that we’ve been forgiven of all our sins, thus giving us the power and ability to forgive others. If this is something you’ve struggled with, here are a few resources to dive deeper and learn about forgiveness.

Bridgetown Church - “Forgiving As We’ve Been Forgiven” Series

Andy Stanley Message On Guilt

It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way - Lysa Terkeurst

In this book Lysa takes you through one of the most vulnerable and defining seasons of forgiveness, disappointment, and reconciliation in her life.

If you are still feeling too hurt to forgive, let her words and story help you navigate your way through it.

Make The Change

  1. Who is someone in your life that you need to make the first move toward forgiveness? 
  2. What is one step you can take toward forgiving that person this week?